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Having been so preoccupied with either finagling a new relationship or holding one together, I’d never had to think about the “p” word before. And I realized I needed to make some headway on deciding what to do with my life, because in the meantime, my quarter-life existential crisis was giving me panic attacks.

So after committing to spending a solid year sorting that out–without sex, dating, or long-term relationships to distract me–I set about putting some solid habits in place.

Six months later, I nailed a regular gig with a major publication that paid several grand a month.

A year later, I was fully independent for the first time in my life, and I started the coaching business I own today.

Within three months, I was earning a string of checks from freelance writing.

At that point I could have escaped into another relationship, and forgotten about my purpose.

But I was fully committed to the single year thing, and in a more immediate material sense, I knew I needed to make some money.

There were times when I silently begged for a former flame to call or text me.

But rather than leaning on my exes or landing a Tinder hookup, I leaned into my work instead.

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